hello world...
i feel like ive been walking for a long time without resting since my last entry...how life can be so different within a few weeks!
im so glad the Lords ways are not my waysand that somehow he always shows up in perfect timming without delay.
Im thankful that he knows what I need without my knowing...he knows how to answer prayers in ways i always thought impossible.
Im more thankful that tho i feel ive been wandering in the wilderness, he is still my anchor and the lighthouse that guides me back to safety when im weary and in need of straightening.
I bought two lighthouse pictures for my house last week....why they asked me? its a secret between meand my father in heaven..the ever present, faithful help in times of need.
he is so amazing that even tho all this stuff is whilwinding around me, the chaos,the betrayal, the sorrow,the anger and confusion.......i look up and i still see him....i look around i see mortality...i look up i see eternity, as eyternal as his love for me...that no heartache shall supercede what MY GOD has andwill do for me!
whatever his plans are, i know through all the heartache and sorrow, he has made way for me!!
Praisethe Lord saints...he binds up the wounded and heals the brokenhearted :)
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Monday, June 26, 2006
funeral
Irene's funeral was today. Special moment was when her friend of 13 years spoke about how Irene was too beautiful for this world. Sad moment was her 3yr daughter saying she wanted to see mummy.
I am glad that i know the LORD is my provider and how he's helping me deal with loss, struggles and tests. I am just one of his children. How is he using Irene's death in the lives of his other children? Her children? How will they cope with the loss of their Mum? I know it's been months since they lived with her, but she was still their Mum. I know she loved them dearly.
I have no idea, but I pray for those two little ones. I pray that Jer 29:11 will be true for them. I put my hope in the LORD that he will provide for them his very best. And that he would show us if there is anything else we can do to help them apart from pray and pray and pray. People, even Christians underestimate the power of prayer. But it's our direct line to the LORD and it gives him the opportunity to act in our lives. In those two little kids lives.
Thank you LORD that what seems impossible to us is more than possible with you. That even though we don't know the answers we know you and trust that you are in control of our lives. In control of Javen and Zarah's lives. Thank you LORD for your love that even death has lost it's sting for us because it means an eternity with you.
In your mighty name, Lord Jesus.
I am glad that i know the LORD is my provider and how he's helping me deal with loss, struggles and tests. I am just one of his children. How is he using Irene's death in the lives of his other children? Her children? How will they cope with the loss of their Mum? I know it's been months since they lived with her, but she was still their Mum. I know she loved them dearly.
I have no idea, but I pray for those two little ones. I pray that Jer 29:11 will be true for them. I put my hope in the LORD that he will provide for them his very best. And that he would show us if there is anything else we can do to help them apart from pray and pray and pray. People, even Christians underestimate the power of prayer. But it's our direct line to the LORD and it gives him the opportunity to act in our lives. In those two little kids lives.
Thank you LORD that what seems impossible to us is more than possible with you. That even though we don't know the answers we know you and trust that you are in control of our lives. In control of Javen and Zarah's lives. Thank you LORD for your love that even death has lost it's sting for us because it means an eternity with you.
In your mighty name, Lord Jesus.
being one
I'm half a person without him,
I'm here in body but the rest of me is waiting in silence for him to return
it's only a glimpse of what it means to be ONE
to love ONE
I might smile, laugh, and no one will know the difference
But if they could see within me
If they could see past my brown eyes
there is something missing
my heart
the light in my day
the LORD's creation made just for me
I'm here in body but the rest of me is waiting in silence for him to return
it's only a glimpse of what it means to be ONE
to love ONE
I might smile, laugh, and no one will know the difference
But if they could see within me
If they could see past my brown eyes
there is something missing
my heart
the light in my day
the LORD's creation made just for me
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
The LORD is our provider
Since the LORD answered my prayers on Monday I have been studying TRUST and doing Joyce's battlefield of the mind series online. He has been filling me with good thoughts and last night I was reminded that I wasn't Irene's only Christian friend. There were a couple of people from church and an old friend of hers and also Frank, our pastor.
Last time I spoke to her she was in contact with Frank. So the LORD had a few people helping her. When she got no joy from one she would ring another.
The LORD would never leave her alone. He knew her state of mind and he never gives up on any of us. He reminded me of who he is and how much he cares for one sheep. Irene made another bad choice and this time there was no going back.
He reminded me of his promise - that in all things he works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Rom 8:28). I don't know why he decided it was time for Irene but his purposes span time and generations. She had two children in foster care.
Who knows. But I trust that he knows best. If I had found out about Irene last week, I wouldn't have overcome my negative thoughts. Satan would have had a field day. It had the potential to break me.
But God's perfect timing meant I didn't find out until he had spoken to me first. Until he had encouraged me and answered my calls for help.
He was probably protecting my next generation - if my emotions effect my baby then she/he is going to be one sad child...marriage problems...lost two special people in my life. These three things alone had the potential to destroy my faith.
Thankfully my hope is in the LORD, and I will trust him with all my heart and not lean on my own understanding and in all my ways I will acknowledge him and he will make my paths straight. (prov 3:5)
Last time I spoke to her she was in contact with Frank. So the LORD had a few people helping her. When she got no joy from one she would ring another.
The LORD would never leave her alone. He knew her state of mind and he never gives up on any of us. He reminded me of who he is and how much he cares for one sheep. Irene made another bad choice and this time there was no going back.
He reminded me of his promise - that in all things he works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Rom 8:28). I don't know why he decided it was time for Irene but his purposes span time and generations. She had two children in foster care.
Who knows. But I trust that he knows best. If I had found out about Irene last week, I wouldn't have overcome my negative thoughts. Satan would have had a field day. It had the potential to break me.
But God's perfect timing meant I didn't find out until he had spoken to me first. Until he had encouraged me and answered my calls for help.
He was probably protecting my next generation - if my emotions effect my baby then she/he is going to be one sad child...marriage problems...lost two special people in my life. These three things alone had the potential to destroy my faith.
Thankfully my hope is in the LORD, and I will trust him with all my heart and not lean on my own understanding and in all my ways I will acknowledge him and he will make my paths straight. (prov 3:5)
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