cycle of life

I'm feeling sad today...probably the hormones, and the realisation that for a person of faith i am full of doubts.

It's weird how the LORD made this cycle of life. We are born into this world as vulnerable little babies totally reliant on others to love us.

We trust and believe in them because we don't know any better.

Then we spend the rest of our lives learning better...doubting or confirming what we use to trust and believe. It would be much easier to spend the rest of our lives as naive children knowing no better.

But this is not the LORD's way. Like my beloved said he doesn't want droids.

At the end of our lives we trust and believe because we do know better.

I am not at the end of my life yet so I still doubt and I still question - there's no magic wand to get me from innocent child to experienced mature child. It will take the rest of my life experiencing 1st hand love, pain, loss, mistakes, joy, doubt, happiness, mercy, hope, and faith.

That's my LORD's way.