home and heart

Last post was all the practical requirements for our house. Now here's my list for a HOME.

• it has be a safe haven for everyone that lives there. Somewhere they can each call home, and feel they belong there.
• somewhere welcoming for all those that visit. Big and small groups. For family gatherings and lots of laughter.
• enough space so everyone is not under each others feet and they can be on their own if they want or hang out together.
• a place for my children to enjoy, and can grow up outdoors, play and have fun.

This seems like a lot but the LORD always finds exactly what we need for that time or season in our lives.

house hunting again

a few months ago i looked for houses but then stopped because I realised i didn't really know what we wanted or needed. I thought i did but i kept changing my mind. So have prayed about it and now I'm starting again.

This is my new wish list:

• a 4 bedroom place, in case myles' sister comes to stay or anyone else long-term with us, and then a room for my brother, for us, and for the kids. When my mum comes over for one of her extended holidays, she will happily bunk in with the kids.
• a large backyard for the kids to play in, a pool is secondary now. We can always go to a beach. Plus my cousin is getting married and needs a place to have to the reception so a large backyard would be perfect.
• somewhere the kids can go to school and close to public transport for those working. A shopping area within walking distance would be great.
• wooden floors because my family is terrible with carpet.

So lets see how we go this time. God willing we should be in a home in the next couple of months.

little touches

The LORD has this way of letting me know he is a part of my daily life and know what's happening in my world right now. Guess what song we sang at church today? Blessed be the name of the LORD. I can't remember the last time we sang this, but someone else at church requested it with our Pastor.

It's these little touches on my life which lets me know how well the LORD knows me. Things like this always bring a smile to my face. Makes me feel special to our LORD who has the world on his shoulders and many many big concerns. Yet he takes time out to to add this little touch to my day. I love him for it. (Thanks, LORD)

weird habit

Just remembered one of my weird habits...was watching this program about a couple who had twins and then sextuplets. The mother is super organised and amazing. Was watching an episode of them in a hotel and she put all her kids on the beds and told them they weren't allowed to step on the floor without putting their shoes on. It so reminded me of me. Except she thought it was normal...i know it's a wee bit weird.

If I stay anwhere which has lots of rooms, like motels or hotels, I get very paranoid about cleanliness. I always have jandals (called thongs here, or flip flops in other countries) which i wear even if the hotel is spotless and has lots of stars. I just think if a maid has lots of rooms to clean she might skip things which look kind of clean but really there are germs everywhere.

I'm especially paranoid about pillowcases. My hubby thinks it's hilarious. I always take a pillow case and if it's just a motel we haven't booked ahead, I take my own sheets. Same reason, a maid might overlook something that looks clean, but a pillow case where someone could have dribbled all over or sheets...well don't need to explain there.

But when i've stayed at a private luxury cottage where there was only one cottage with a beautiful bed with white linen and very little else to tidy...I thought this must be clean...they need their guests to be spoilt because they only have one expensive cottage to rent out and only one room plus a bathroom to clean. So the pillowcase stayed in the bag :)

Yip, I'm weird....but now travelling with a child and another on the way...i might behave a little more sane...or insane??...but still might keep the jandal habit :)

ditzy

i did something very stupid tonite...it's one of those had to be there moments to appreciate...but i was so ditzy i have to share.

We bought a bar stool which needed to be put together. So me thinking I am so good at putting things together. In fairness the instructions had 4 pictures and no written instructions. It was going great till i had to connect the seat to the base and had 8 screws which were very difficult to put in and very difficult to screw because there wasn't enough room to insert the allen key.

So I thought I just had to be patient and hold it all together and squeeze my fingers into the gap to insert the screw and twist it. It took me ages...at least 15-20mins to do 4 screws. But I just couldn't insert the allen key so I had to leave them untightened. I told Myles and he was like 'no, you must be able to tighten them'.

And then I sat on the bar stool and it twirled around...I thought how cool and told Myles. And he came and turned it upside down to have a look and low and behold because I twirled on it, suddenly the screws were all visible and lots of room to tighten them :) It took him less then a minute...it would have taken me less then 5mins had I realised it. I had to crack up laughing. Honestly it never twirled when i was trying to screw it altogether. So funny. Had to be there.

Blessed be the name of the LORD

Blessed be Your name in the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

And blessed be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out I'll turn back to praise
And when the darkness closes in, Lord Still I will say

CHORUS:
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name when the sun's shining down on me
When the world's "all as it should be"
Blessed be Your name

And blessed be Your name on the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say Lord, blessed be Your name

CHORUS

(Matt Redman)

This is a hard song but it has been so relevant to my every day life that when i first heard it, at a Hillsong conference, I balled my eyes out. I was reminded of this song today reading about another Christian going through hard times.

It was a life lesson i learnt throught tragedy and testing...it's easy to praise the LORD when life is wonderful but when life sucks and Satan attacks it's even harder and we have to make a choice: to keep praising, trusting and putting our hope in our Saviour OR to give up. I'm not sure which is easier but I decided a long time ago that Satan can harm me physically and mentally but spiritually I can choose to believe and he can't take that away from me unless I give it up myself. He never wins because it's my spirit he's after and that's safe with the LORD for all eternity. So when the darkness closes in I can still choose to say Blessed be the name of the LORD.

7 random things about me

This is from Faith who tagged me for this post on 7 random things about me.

Now this bit i copied from her blog:
The rules are to link the person who sent this to you...and leave a comment on their blog.. so their readers can visit yours.
Post the rules on your blog
Share 7 strange/weird facts about you on your blog
Tag 7 random people at the end of your post, linking their blog
Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving them a comment on their blog...


I can do all of this except tag 7 people - I don't know that many people in blog world. But this was fun, thanks Faith.


My 7 things:

1. i was born with blonde hair and my parents are both Samoan (a little island nation in the Pacific) so both have black hair. My Mum has about 1/32th English in her so that's probably why and she had light brown hair when she was young. But now my hair is a dark brown with only little wisps of blonde on the sides of my forehead.
   
2. Most people like nice people but I like people who come off as being rude because they are blunt and speak their mind. Most people think I'm nice but i am just as blunt. I just get along better with people who are sincere then people who are nice and diplomatic. Even if it means they might hurt my feelings. I prefer knowing what a person thinks of me, then having them be nice to my face and talk behind my back. I value honesty and straightforwardness more than a false sense of peace. I have had to learn that not everyone likes this :)
   
3. i'm a serious night owl. So I am wide awake in the early hours of the morning...some of my best times with the LORD have been at 3-4am. If you were to speak to me in the morning I would be monosyllabic in response. But at night you can't shut me up. Yet my man is a morning person which I think is the LORD having a laugh.
   
4. I have a hang up about speaking on phones. My family tend to have their phones glued to their hips and answer every call. Me, I don't even know where my phone is half the time. If i'm busy in the house, I just don't bother running for the phone. I much prefer seeing people in person or emailing or texting. I think it's because I don't like interrupting people's days so i barely ring anyone. So now my family knows if they want to get a hold of me urgently they ring my husband's phone.
   
5. i love the sea, I love being in the water, anything to do with it...cruises, ferry rides, houseboats, beaches, pools, etc. But this is the weird bit. I'm a bad swimmer. I nearly drowned once when I was about 14 but it didn't put me off. I can backstroke or dog paddle but to swim properly would be 50m at most.
   
6. I don't have the obsession most women have with chocolate. This makes me especially weird in my church because all the women love chocolate. At our women's retreats everyone's eating chocolate and i'm having something savoury.


7. I love being out in the rain. In the sea when it rains is perfect! Myles on the other hand hates being in the rain. So if we were caught in a rainstorm or slight shower, he would run from shelter to shelter waiting for me to catch up as I walked happily through it as if it was a beautiful sunny day.

so the only other person I know on blog world is Lill

2nd child

Heard my baby's heartbeat today. Beating loud and strong! More to be thankful for. All glory to my LORD. It amazes me how I can't feel this little creation growing in me and yet today I had real evidence that all is right with his/her world. My LORD is producing yet another miracle. Thank you LORD.

thankful

My friend Faith does a weekly post of what she's thankful for and I am in a very thankful mood so all praise belongs to the LORD. Hence this post.

• answered prayer...the LORD has made the recovery from this latest blow up with my Mum so much more smoother...so it's getting easier. We have had a good week together.
• family...spent today at the National Park at Wattamola beach which was wonderful. My man and son are both sick so they missed out. I would have stayed home but I organised the day and was taking all the food for the picnic so had to go. It wasn't the same but my nieces and nephews were so entertaining that I just loved being in the company.
• beautiful days which end in rain and thunderstorms. I love the sea and thunderstorms and had both today. God is awesome.
• playing lifeguard floating in the water behind the kids screaming out 'wave!' so they would all jump on their boogy boards and try to ride the wave in. Then walking from seaside to riverside to watch the kids scramble on to rocks, and scream out 'aunty tali look at me' or 'help aunty tali' when they started to slip.
• coming home to my own child. Hugging and kissing him as much as possible without annoying him :)
• for a hubby to do with life with.
• for all those holidays and day trips with my own parents where all i had to do was get up, get myself ready and jump in the car...meanwhile my parents were up early preparing food and everything else we would need for the day. I always knew I was lucky but being an aunty and mum has given me a new appreciation of this...I'm the one now preparing food and everything else!

mum

my prayer for today is LORD please desensitize me. My Mum and I can't survive one long visit - she's been here since November, without a blow up. Now every comment she makes just rubs me up the wrong way. I wish I was exaggerating but it takes a lot to make me angry, and two days ago I was very angry.

I don't want to spend this post complaining about my Mum, because I love her to bits and I know she loves me. But if I'm going to survive the next few weeks I need the LORD's help. I need to let her comments and opinions just go over my head. To try and make these next few weeks fun and enjoyable for her.

Plan to take her sightseeing tomorrow - places she hasn't been to, plus a little shopping at one of her favourite shops. Then Tues dinner at my cousin's place. Wednesday we're packing a picnic and going with all the grandchildren to this beautiful beach in the National Park. She's already starting to plan what food we're going to make for it :)

But I spend all day and all night with my Mum so I need better coping strategies. Stuff like, time out somehow - nap with Caleb twice a day...go out with Myles and Caleb one night just to get time alone.

I have a hospital appointment on Thursday which I will probably take Mum to, though not in to the actual appointment because the opinions will overflow, and I will be asking for trouble :)

Today was a very full day, so I had time out from Mum. Went to a 1st birthday today, my cousin's son. That was all day. It was so hot that while we were at the party another cousin brought over my 2 nieces for a swim at my place. We came back and an hour later another cousin and her son came for a swim, plus my aunty. They stayed till after 9pm.

So LORD, please help me to be patient with my Mum, to not take her comments and opinions personally, and to not let my anger lead me to sin, if it rears it's ugly head again. Help me to put her in perspective LORD, please. To remember all the good she is trying to do, and to talk to her with respect. To remember your word to me that time when she upset me so much over the phone that i cried out to you. And in my ranting and raving you whispered that one thought to me : she needs more love than you. It melted my anger and reminded me how she's alone in this world, with no Dad to talk to, who was so patient with her, loved her and spoiled her.

Help me to remember that LORD so I will treat her with compassion and acceptance. To remember how over our lives she has prayed for us, her children, and tried to do her best. Most importantly that I she brought me up knowing you and believing in you.

My Mum is 60 this year. She deserves my respect, she has 20 years of life experience on me. help me LORD to have a good attitude with her. To forgive her easily.

Forgive me for losing my temper and forgetting that I belong to you. I need you LORD. In Jesus' name I pray.

all about caleb

Trying to remember this year. I think because it's all been about caleb, my whole focus has been him, learning how to be a mum, and enjoying his 1st year. So what did i learn, what did i experience hasn't been that much outside of my role as mum. Life was a lot simpler.

The 1st couple of months were a struggle, because I was so green and my milk took so long to come in. And my Mum stressed me out big time.

Then things started to settle down and routines started to develop. I think I barely left the house for the 1st 6 mths, apart from to hop in the car with myles.

Caleb highlights...sleeping with him in my arms for the 1st time at the hospital, watching him and his facial expressions, responding to us, smiling, laughing, 1st baths and showers, learning to crawl, eating 1st foods, getting his 1st teeth, cuddles, kisses, sleeping in my arms, on my lap, how he would watch people as if he was observing them, crying whenever the car stopped at lights, 1st words, 1st steps, playing with a box, watching tv ads....so many.

Going to the park for our anniversary in May and Caleb's 5th bday - just a small picnic, the 3 of us, enjoying our time on our picnic mat, by the sea. Going on our 1st plane ride to Byron Bay.

Plus succeeding on our 2nd attempt at IVF. We thought it might not be as easy as the 1st time when we had Caleb. But it was so quick and with little problems. Thanks to the LORD.

That's all i can remember for now.

end of 2007

loved the dvd nite and I actually stayed awake. Went to bed about 4:30am. It was funny because I was wide awake and felt like I could do another dvd and within 5mins my eyes started to close. So went to bed after 3 dvds.

Been thinking about 2007 and what I learnt and experienced...and have yet to really get a handle on it. This is weird for me, because I'm an overanalyser and I can normally do this without much thought. It's written down somewhere and I just bring it all together. Not this time. I wonder why? See I am overanalysing already.

ps did i mention my son is walking everywhere now? He just clicked one day and has been walking and standing up without any support. He started doing 5/6 steps and falling months ago, but last week he just seemed to click and walked to Grandma. Awesome!!!