my son walked today!!! He took his 1st 5-6 steps towards me. He was at the time busy trying to hold on to my legs while i was in the kitchen. so I took his hands off me and tried to let him stand on his own. But as I moved away he moved towards me.
Of course, I scooped him up and screamed in celebration which kind of scared him. It was such an awesome moment and he didn't even realise he'd done it!!! He was just trying to get a hold of his mummy.
Only last nite myles was looking at an old photo of caleb when he was much smaller. He was reminiscing about how he was so small and couldn't do anything but lie there. We had to do everything for him...and now he can walk!!!!!
How amazing is the LORD!!! How he formed us in our mother's womb, and made life so that we would learn so much in such a small period of time. What a Master Creator. He deserves all the glory!
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Sunday, November 18, 2007
churches
Christians search for that perfect church one where they can belong to as part of God's body. But churches are never perfect. And why should they be? If there is one thing i know about my LORD is he loves imperfect. He loves us. And churches are made up of very imperfect christians. Humans are imperfect. Even in the world there are no perfect organisations.
And churches are very different from each other. To be expected because we are different and have different needs and passions. I have belonged to awesome churches and not so good ones, even ones that were great and became very bad.
I wonder what makes a good church? For me, the most important criteria is illustrated by that church that went wrong. It's going to seem obvious when i say it and people take it for granted that all churches are led this way...but...anyway...they must be God led - God's vision for that church no matter how big or small, helps that church fit into the Lord's body, everyone fulfilling their God given purpose...a primary vision or purpose.
If it's not led by the LORD and he walks out the door waiting to be invited back...nothing will come of that church. Even if it does good works - it's not the good works the LORD planned in advance for that church. They can wander around in the desert for as long as it takes.
Two other keys for me are RELEVANCE and UNITY. These two words illustrate that we are IN the world but not OF the world.
A united church shows the world a different example - the example of Father, Son and Holy Spirit...united as ONE but each fulfiling a different role. A family. For me this starts with the leadership team. They are the examples we aspire to and try to follow...if they say one thing and do another, if they don't know how to be a team...if they are not God led and blow with the wind...then how is that different from the world's example? In fact some in the world do unity better, do family better :(
A relevant church reaches out and touches worldly lives. It's not stuck in a century long gone, but adapts to the community around them. Jesus is timeless. One of the things I love about him is his ability to meet the need of whoever he was talking to - he knew them, their greatest trouble, their worse fears and deepest need and he gave them a different option.
He was the Son of God so of course he's the author of discernment. But if we want to be like him, then we need to get to know our local community, not just the bigger picture...save the world...but who ever is in front of our eyes...our neighbours.
And then we need to offer them a different option - that works....yip it has to work...and it can't just be window dressing...otherwise people will leave disillusioned. Our Lord was always sincere and never offered something he couldn't deliver - false hope belongs to Satan, not to believers of the One true God.
Like us churches are works in progress. Like us, they develop a relationship with the LORD over the years. And this relationship like any other has ups and downs. Do I belong to a church that fits these 3 things that are important to me?
We are only a couple of years old so it's very early days for us...i think we are trying to be God led, relevant and united. We are trying to build a family that functions well together. It's a beginning. We have made mistakes but like I said, churches, like people, are not perfect.
And churches are very different from each other. To be expected because we are different and have different needs and passions. I have belonged to awesome churches and not so good ones, even ones that were great and became very bad.
I wonder what makes a good church? For me, the most important criteria is illustrated by that church that went wrong. It's going to seem obvious when i say it and people take it for granted that all churches are led this way...but...anyway...they must be God led - God's vision for that church no matter how big or small, helps that church fit into the Lord's body, everyone fulfilling their God given purpose...a primary vision or purpose.
If it's not led by the LORD and he walks out the door waiting to be invited back...nothing will come of that church. Even if it does good works - it's not the good works the LORD planned in advance for that church. They can wander around in the desert for as long as it takes.
Two other keys for me are RELEVANCE and UNITY. These two words illustrate that we are IN the world but not OF the world.
A united church shows the world a different example - the example of Father, Son and Holy Spirit...united as ONE but each fulfiling a different role. A family. For me this starts with the leadership team. They are the examples we aspire to and try to follow...if they say one thing and do another, if they don't know how to be a team...if they are not God led and blow with the wind...then how is that different from the world's example? In fact some in the world do unity better, do family better :(
A relevant church reaches out and touches worldly lives. It's not stuck in a century long gone, but adapts to the community around them. Jesus is timeless. One of the things I love about him is his ability to meet the need of whoever he was talking to - he knew them, their greatest trouble, their worse fears and deepest need and he gave them a different option.
He was the Son of God so of course he's the author of discernment. But if we want to be like him, then we need to get to know our local community, not just the bigger picture...save the world...but who ever is in front of our eyes...our neighbours.
And then we need to offer them a different option - that works....yip it has to work...and it can't just be window dressing...otherwise people will leave disillusioned. Our Lord was always sincere and never offered something he couldn't deliver - false hope belongs to Satan, not to believers of the One true God.
Like us churches are works in progress. Like us, they develop a relationship with the LORD over the years. And this relationship like any other has ups and downs. Do I belong to a church that fits these 3 things that are important to me?
We are only a couple of years old so it's very early days for us...i think we are trying to be God led, relevant and united. We are trying to build a family that functions well together. It's a beginning. We have made mistakes but like I said, churches, like people, are not perfect.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
house hunting
I have been house hunting for a couple of months now. Not sure if i've mentioned it already. We rent and we moved into this place 18mths ago. We lived in a unit but with a baby coming we decided to find a house.
My brother who lives with us was going to find his own place. But he changed his mind - I think he enjoys Caleb's company too much :-)
Usually i have a list of requirements and i pray about it. The LORD has always met these and given me even more than i expected. When we found this place Myles and I both liked it immediately even with it's flaws. But it wasn't in our price range. I prayed about it and knew if the LORD wanted us to have this place it would go down in price. So I kept an eye on it and it did.
It has been great - swimming pool for all the kids during summer, Christmas here with all the family. But we need more bedrooms as my brother is staying on and Myles' sister is moving over from New Zealand.
So now my list has lots of things and over the 2 mths i have changed my mind about what's important. And I thought perhaps the LORD wants me to stay in a place which is less than perfect for once. I told him that's fine just show me which place.
So today found a house which was in Brighton, lots of chill out areas, close to cafes and supermarket, but 2 bedrooms were small. Lots of character - I loved it. But Myles wasn't sold on it. I just put it down to the LORD's answer of a less then perfect home.
I was so sure it would be a great place for us to live. So I convinced Myles and we were going to apply tomorrow. But normally when we find a place Myles and I both like it. So that stuck with me. I said to the LORD if we apply and you don't want us to live there then please don't let us get it.
The LORD has given me all of what i asked for in this house and more. But I have changed my mind again. It's too much to take a place that I like and Myles isn't sure about. We both need to like it. It's not only another requirement but the most important one.
When I first started searching a pool was a must. Then it became near a station. Myles coming home earlier was a must. It must have 4 bedrooms because Myles sister needs her own room. But then I started thinking 3 bedrooms would be enough.
It seems I really don't know what I want or what is a priority. So how is the LORD suppose to answer my prayer if I keep changing my mind?? It makes me thankful that I know who my LORD is. Thankful for his patience at my indecisiveness. Thankful that he knows me better than I know myself. And he knows my man, our lives, Caleb, our yet to be born child...all these things he takes into account when he answers my prayer.
He knows what's best for all of us because he sees the whole picture. So I have decided to amend my prayer even further by saying I don't know what I want, please help me decide what's important, what we need. And most importantly let Myles and I both know and have peace about it.
My search begins again.
My brother who lives with us was going to find his own place. But he changed his mind - I think he enjoys Caleb's company too much :-)
Usually i have a list of requirements and i pray about it. The LORD has always met these and given me even more than i expected. When we found this place Myles and I both liked it immediately even with it's flaws. But it wasn't in our price range. I prayed about it and knew if the LORD wanted us to have this place it would go down in price. So I kept an eye on it and it did.
It has been great - swimming pool for all the kids during summer, Christmas here with all the family. But we need more bedrooms as my brother is staying on and Myles' sister is moving over from New Zealand.
So now my list has lots of things and over the 2 mths i have changed my mind about what's important. And I thought perhaps the LORD wants me to stay in a place which is less than perfect for once. I told him that's fine just show me which place.
So today found a house which was in Brighton, lots of chill out areas, close to cafes and supermarket, but 2 bedrooms were small. Lots of character - I loved it. But Myles wasn't sold on it. I just put it down to the LORD's answer of a less then perfect home.
I was so sure it would be a great place for us to live. So I convinced Myles and we were going to apply tomorrow. But normally when we find a place Myles and I both like it. So that stuck with me. I said to the LORD if we apply and you don't want us to live there then please don't let us get it.
The LORD has given me all of what i asked for in this house and more. But I have changed my mind again. It's too much to take a place that I like and Myles isn't sure about. We both need to like it. It's not only another requirement but the most important one.
When I first started searching a pool was a must. Then it became near a station. Myles coming home earlier was a must. It must have 4 bedrooms because Myles sister needs her own room. But then I started thinking 3 bedrooms would be enough.
It seems I really don't know what I want or what is a priority. So how is the LORD suppose to answer my prayer if I keep changing my mind?? It makes me thankful that I know who my LORD is. Thankful for his patience at my indecisiveness. Thankful that he knows me better than I know myself. And he knows my man, our lives, Caleb, our yet to be born child...all these things he takes into account when he answers my prayer.
He knows what's best for all of us because he sees the whole picture. So I have decided to amend my prayer even further by saying I don't know what I want, please help me decide what's important, what we need. And most importantly let Myles and I both know and have peace about it.
My search begins again.
Friday, November 09, 2007
boring life
my life this week is full of boring moments. I'm overly tired and spend the day getting by. I recognise it as being pregnant because i was exactly like this with caleb. Except I didn't have caleb so i slept 10-12hours. But at the moment there is an almost 11mth little boy crawling around exploring his little world which is our lounge and kitchen. So I sit on the floor with him playing with his toys or lie on a couch exhausted...plus i do my housewife chores.
This week has been especially extreme because of the depressing winter like weather...dark, cloudy, cold, wet on and off throughtout the day...not the kind of rain that you can enjoy but just drizzling on and off. It doesn't really fill me with enthusiasm to wrap up in warm waterproof gear and take caleb for a stroll. I can't drive.
If i didn't recognise my personal signs of being preggy then I would probably pull my hair out at how mundane my life is. But I know this too shall pass. I just need to wait for the weather to change, for the weekend to roll in, and my energy levels to return. Plus my man can drive and we can get out and about without worrying about caleb being caught in rain or cold weather.
I am having coffee with my aunty tomorrow after house hunting in the morning. Then Sunday my cousin is baptising her 2 boys. So another family filled weekend. At some point I am going to take time out, sit in a cafe by a beach and just enjoy the fresh sea air. That always works wonders at restoring my soul.
It's funny but if i didn't know myself so well then all this could be very depressing. But I have a strong spirit thanks to the LORD and I know my coping mechanisms, thanks to the LORD :-)
This too shall pass.
This week has been especially extreme because of the depressing winter like weather...dark, cloudy, cold, wet on and off throughtout the day...not the kind of rain that you can enjoy but just drizzling on and off. It doesn't really fill me with enthusiasm to wrap up in warm waterproof gear and take caleb for a stroll. I can't drive.
If i didn't recognise my personal signs of being preggy then I would probably pull my hair out at how mundane my life is. But I know this too shall pass. I just need to wait for the weather to change, for the weekend to roll in, and my energy levels to return. Plus my man can drive and we can get out and about without worrying about caleb being caught in rain or cold weather.
I am having coffee with my aunty tomorrow after house hunting in the morning. Then Sunday my cousin is baptising her 2 boys. So another family filled weekend. At some point I am going to take time out, sit in a cafe by a beach and just enjoy the fresh sea air. That always works wonders at restoring my soul.
It's funny but if i didn't know myself so well then all this could be very depressing. But I have a strong spirit thanks to the LORD and I know my coping mechanisms, thanks to the LORD :-)
This too shall pass.
Monday, November 05, 2007
another little one
my run in with God's little creatures continues...found a lizard in my cupboard...just a little one. so chased it out the backdoor. Good thing my mum wasn't here, she would scream the house down...she hates lizards. And hopefully my brother didn't run into that huntsman spider on the patio as he hates spiders. Must remember to tell him so he can keep an eye out...he's forever smoking out there.
nesting
I have had a serious nesting day...when pregnant women have the urge to spring clean everything...hence why i am still awake at 12:56am.
I have also had a day surrounded by the LORD's little creatures...insects. This usually happens when the weather is hot, everything tries to crawl inside our cool house.
Firstly, a dragonfly with a broken wing, I tried to entice it on to a paper towel, but it wouldn't budge so I left it on my window. But tonite it succumbed and Myles had to put it out of it's misery...that was sad. I set a christmas beetle and slug free and a rather large huntsman spider. The spider crawled in as i opened the patio door to put the slug out. So I chased it back out with a piece of paper and then a moth flew in :-)
I try not to kill anything i find, preferring to chase it back outside...unless they refuse to cooperate. I had to squat a fly because it landed on caleb's portacot. I tried chasing it away but it just sat there. So my over-protective motherly instincts kicked in...that's caleb's playpen. I made sure not to squash it, but still sterilised the spot.
So apart from the creatures, I have cleaned, emptied out all my linen to be washed and packed till next winter, mopped my bedroom floor, rearranged my bedroom, packed things into the garage, did all the dishes (which the boys are meant to do on weekends), and now I feel like making baby food to be frozen for caleb.
Come tomorrow i will be too tired to do anything...oh well, better to make the most of these moments :-)
I have also had a day surrounded by the LORD's little creatures...insects. This usually happens when the weather is hot, everything tries to crawl inside our cool house.
Firstly, a dragonfly with a broken wing, I tried to entice it on to a paper towel, but it wouldn't budge so I left it on my window. But tonite it succumbed and Myles had to put it out of it's misery...that was sad. I set a christmas beetle and slug free and a rather large huntsman spider. The spider crawled in as i opened the patio door to put the slug out. So I chased it back out with a piece of paper and then a moth flew in :-)
I try not to kill anything i find, preferring to chase it back outside...unless they refuse to cooperate. I had to squat a fly because it landed on caleb's portacot. I tried chasing it away but it just sat there. So my over-protective motherly instincts kicked in...that's caleb's playpen. I made sure not to squash it, but still sterilised the spot.
So apart from the creatures, I have cleaned, emptied out all my linen to be washed and packed till next winter, mopped my bedroom floor, rearranged my bedroom, packed things into the garage, did all the dishes (which the boys are meant to do on weekends), and now I feel like making baby food to be frozen for caleb.
Come tomorrow i will be too tired to do anything...oh well, better to make the most of these moments :-)
Friday, November 02, 2007
baby love
i think i may have written about this before...but it's because i'm pregnant again. I was holding my son last nite, he was having a very restless sleep and kept waking up. As soon as i held him he was still and nestled into me. Of course, I indulged and held him for a wee while before returning him to his cot. A mother's privilege :-)
i wondered if i would love him as much when he's a 30 year old man, or when he's my age with children of his own and a wife...well that's one view of his future...point being would i love him as much or more because i would have spent 30 years loving him and watching him grow.
Or is this it? When you son or daughter is this baby in your arms and in so much need of protection and love? And as he gets older i need to learn to step back and let him grow up and grow away from me. Is that another lesson of love? We are only stewards of those we love, we don't own them and they don't owe us anything. We had the privilege of taking care of them when they needed it the most but eventually they need to move on to their next phase in life.
I can't imagine loving a 30something man the way i love my little boy...but then it's in seeing him grow over the years and become that man which will help me love him just as much. I assume this will happen. Any parent with older children - is this true? Do you love your children just as much now as when they were little babies?
Maybe the LORD does give us that special bond with our babies and little children because they need to be loved so much. That's when they learn to love so we need to be such great examples of love for them to follow.
i wondered if i would love him as much when he's a 30 year old man, or when he's my age with children of his own and a wife...well that's one view of his future...point being would i love him as much or more because i would have spent 30 years loving him and watching him grow.
Or is this it? When you son or daughter is this baby in your arms and in so much need of protection and love? And as he gets older i need to learn to step back and let him grow up and grow away from me. Is that another lesson of love? We are only stewards of those we love, we don't own them and they don't owe us anything. We had the privilege of taking care of them when they needed it the most but eventually they need to move on to their next phase in life.
I can't imagine loving a 30something man the way i love my little boy...but then it's in seeing him grow over the years and become that man which will help me love him just as much. I assume this will happen. Any parent with older children - is this true? Do you love your children just as much now as when they were little babies?
Maybe the LORD does give us that special bond with our babies and little children because they need to be loved so much. That's when they learn to love so we need to be such great examples of love for them to follow.
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